Christmas Card Mysteries: No 7

It is rehearsed almost to the point of irritation that there was 'no room for them in the inn'.  And I write that as the chair of a charity that helps the homeless and lonely.  The near irritation derives from the patently obvious fact that it is far more significant that Jesus died deserted than that he was born 'not in the inn' though the latter is admittedly a portent of his greater rejection.

Unfortunately most Christmases are darkened by world events and it is also a cliched truth that Jesus's family were forced to flee their country.  Again, it was not general world politics but actual human hatred directed at king Jesus that is reason for the story, but it still reminds us that Christ is more easily seen in the tents than in the palaces.

Anyhow, welcome to my latest Christmas Card Mystery.  Mystery No 6 had disappearing shepherds.  This card catapults Christ beyond the experience of a humble birth and a toddler refugee experience: it makes him an orphan.  It's great news for Barnardos fundraising department.  Less good for the Catholic devotion to BVM*  who it seems, with Joseph, has left the kid in the hay in the open air to be rescued by passing shepherds and wise men.

And you thought parenting in 2016 was bad?

*Blessed Virgin Mary for the non-liturgical reader

A Son's Tribute - Holding Hands

My Mum and Dad often held hands.  Not just at the beginning of their courtship but right through to their Golden Wedding Anniversary and several years beyond.  People sometimes remarked about it, for plenty of married couples don't hold hands much anymore.

 

Perhaps the most significant thing is this though: they were holding hands at the end of their marriage.

 

Just about everyone holds hands at the beginning.  As the old Prayer Book has it -

 

Then shall they give their troth to each other in this manner. The Minister, receiving the Woman at her father's or friend's hands, shall cause the Man with his right hand to take the Woman by her right hand, and to say after him as followeth.

 

Even a humanist celebrant in the Registry Office will instruct similarly.

 

There are no such instructions for the end of a Marriage though.  Many marriages in my parents' lifetimes have ended with a shout, an angry letter, a slammed door or at the very best a formal handshake as the solicitors finish their mediation of a tolerable settlement.

 

As my Dad lay dying, thus ending his marriage as he vowed he would - 'til death do us part - my Mum was kindly brought to his bedside and there, at the moment of his death (and the death of the marriage) she was holing his hand.

 

Of course it is fanciful to imagine that such a beautiful ending can always be secured in a world of sudden accidents and striking illnesses.  But for all of us who have made those vows as we held hands on our Wedding Day it is far less fanciful to hold to the determination that at least we should want to hold hands when our marriage ends. That was what the vow meant, wasn't it?