Top Funeral Songs 2018: 1. My Way

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and here is number 1 (no surprise to those of us who frequent crematoria) - 'My Way' (Frank Sinatra)

Why it's good for a funeral:

It celebrates individuality.

Why it's bad for a funeral:

The sentiment in the song is the direct opposite of Christian discipleship.  Without (presumably) intending to be,  it is about as deeply offensive to Christian faith as it is possible to be.

Line that's most like a Christian song:

And now, the end is near

Line that's least like a Christian song:

For what is a man, what he has got, if not himself then he has naught.

A Quote from (singer) Frank Sinatra:

'Alcohol may be a man's worst enemy but the Bible says, "Love your enemy"'.

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

Because if I did it my way it was a waste of a whole life.

A better Christian alternative:

This is a hymn we sang (yes, I was there) at the memorial Service for Martin Lloyd-Jones in 1981.  If you can spare the time, absorb it and reflect on how opposite it is to the sentiments of Sinatra's mistakenly much-loved croon.

Here is a recording of that singing:

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 2. Time to say Good-bye (orig. Con te partiro)

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and this time number 2 - 'Time to say Good-bye' (Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman) . . .

Why it's good for a funeral:

It IS 'Time to say Good-bye'.

Why it's bad for a funeral:

Its English translation from the Italian is widely regarded as gobbledygook [see example below].

Line that's most like a Christian song:

Then I know you are here with me

Line that's least like a Christian song:

Mm. A lot to choose from, including lines shouldn't be in any song.  How about
'over seas that I know now, no, they don't exist any more.'

A Quote from (singer) Sarah Brightman:

'We are all made up of stars and all of us are billions of years old.  That's what I believe, at least.'

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

Because even if I did want a secular song I'd want one that I'd understood.

A better Christian alternative:

'When we all get to heaven
What a day of rejoicing that will be
When we all see Jesus,
We'll sing and shout the victory!'

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 3. Over the Rainbow (Eva Cassidy)

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and this time number 3 - 'Over the Rainbow' (Eva Cassidy) . . .

Why it's good for a funeral:

It has wistful longing, reflecting feelings associated with Eva Cassidy's own early death from cancer and, more recently, Ariana Grande's response tribute to the Manchester Arena bombing of 2017.  Though originally it hails from Judy Garland and The Wizard of Oz.

Why it's bad for a funeral:

It rather misses the point of a rainbow which is SomeONE over it rather than someWHERE.

Line that's most like a Christian song:

What a wonderful world.

Line that's least like a Christian song:

Someday I wish upon a star.

A Quote from (singer) Ariana Grande's grandpa:

"You know what you should end with? 'Over the Rainbow'" [so, after the Manchester bombing, she did]

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

It may be a wonderful world but by my funeral I'll have seen the last of it.  And it's not that wonderful compared to where I trust by the grace of God I might be going.

A better Christian alternative:

All the wonderful world - but with soul and a hope.

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 4. Wind beneath my wings (Bette Midler)

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and this time number 4 - 'Wind beneath my wings' performed by Bette Midler  . . .

Why it's good for a funeral:

It thanks God (just about).

Why it's bad for a funeral:

It's all about the other person - presumably the dead one - so a bit late to sing it to them.

Line that's most like a Christian song:

Thank God for you.

Line that's least like a Christian song:

So I was the one with all the glory.

A Quote from (singer) Bette Midler:

'I celebrate everyone's religious holidays.  If it's good enough for the righteous, it's good enough for the self-righteous I always say.'

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

It seems doggerel to me, and I'm nobody's hero.

A better Christian alternative:

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 5. Angels (Robbie Williams)

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and this time number 5 - 'Angels' - (Robbie Williams)  . . .

Why it's good for a funeral:

Great melody and sort of other-worldly.

Why it's bad for a funeral:

Angels have their uses but they're a poor substitute for their Boss.  Death is a big deal and needs the Boss.

Line that's most like a Christian Song

And I know I'll always be blessed with love

Line that's least like a Christian song:

I'm loving angels instead

A Quote from (singer) Robbie Williams:

Sometimes I feel like I'm sailing on a sunken dream.

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

Nothing against angels, but this song is like requesting the funeral director's window cleaner instead of the director themselves - how about loving God instead?

A better Christian alternative:

[Hail the day that sees him rise]

Highest heaven its Lord recieves

Yet he loves the earth he leaves

Though returning to his throne

Still he calls us all his own.

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 6. Supermarket Flowers (Ed Sheeran)

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and this time number 6 - 'Supermarket Flowers' performed by Ed Sheeran  . . .

Why it's good for a funeral:

It was written for a funeral and it has God in it - although strangely the God in this song says, "Hallelujah" (which means Praise God . . .).

Why it's bad for a funeral:

It's a personal tribute song with little to do with anyone else's loved one.  A bit like listening to the funeral before the one you're at.

Line that's most like a Christian song:

So I'll sing Hallelujah

Line that's least like a Christian song:

'Poured the old ginger beer down the sink'

A Quote from (singer) Ed Sheeran:

Everything will be okay in the end.

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

It's about someone else's family and private grief.

A better Christian alternative:

Hallelujah! sing to Jesus,
  His the scepter, His the throne;
Hallelujah! His the triumph,
  His the victory alone . . .

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 7. Unforgettable (Nat King Cole)

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and this time number 7 - 'Unforgettable' performed by Nat King Cole  . . .

Why it's good for a funeral:

Funerals help us remember - to make someone more unforgettable.

Why it's bad for a funeral:

It's nothing to do with death, life in general, or life beyond death - just a sweet romantic song.

Line that's most like a Christian song:

It's incredible that someone so unforgettable thinks I'm unforgettable too.

Line that's least like a Christian song:

'Darling' [It's the one word in the song that means, however hard you try, you can't associate it with your relationship with God!]

A Quote from (singer) Nat King Cole:

'I'm in the music business for one purpose - to make money'

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

I have no interest in being unforgettable - at least by humans. 

A better Christian alternative:

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 8. You Raise Me Up (Westlife)

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and this time number 8 - You raise me up, popularised by Westlife, covered by half the music industry . . .

Why it's good for a funeral:

Norwegian Rolf Lovland originally wrote the music for his own mother's funeral. (Brendan Graham wrote the lyrics).

Why it's bad for a funeral:

It doesn't contain God (unless you supply him by how you mean the words).

Line that's most like a Christian song:

You raise me up to more than I can be

Line that's least like a Christian song:

[Not applicable - as Brendan Graham was for a while a Catholic Seminarian it all has Christian echoes]

A Quote from (writer) Brendan Graham:

'Keep a green bough in your heart and the singing bird will come'.

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

It is so much like a hymn I might as well have a real hymn which honours God rather than one that reflects a hopeful ideal.

A better Christian alternative:

.

[There is a Redeemer . . .]

When I stand in Glory

I will see His face

And there I'll serve my King forever

In that Holy Place

Thank you, oh my father

For giving us Your Son

And leaving Your Spirit

'Til the work on Earth is done

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 9. We'll meet again (Vera Lynn)

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs (now containing no Christian songs or hymns).  I'm looking at the merits and demerits of the top ten, and number 9 - We'll meet again, sung by Vera Lynn:

Why it's good for a funeral:

It sounds hopeful.

Why it's bad for a funeral:

Dying is not much like going off to war (the song dates from 1939 and the hope of sunnier, post-war times down the track).  Over 99% of UK military personnel outlived the Second World War.  The percentage for general death survival hovers around 0%.  (Though at the time of writing Vera Lynn is closer to cheating this statistic than most of us - she's aged 102!)

Line that's most like a Christian song:

We'll meet again

Line that's least like a Christian song:

Don't know where

A Quote from (performer) Vera Lynn:

Seeing a severely disabled five-year-old smile, or his parents laugh, reminds me that giving up isn’t worth it — persistence can be so rewarding.

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

I wasn't alive in World War 2.

A better Christian alternative:

.

[Ten Thousand times Ten Thousand . . .]

O then what raptured greetings

On Canaan's happy shore.

What knitting severed friendships up

Where partings are no more!

Then eyes with joy shall sparkle

That brimmed with tears of late;

Orphans no longer fatherless

Nor widows desolate.

Top Ten Funeral Songs 2018: 10. Always look on the Bright Side of Life [Eric Idle]

2018:  The Co-operative Funeral Services list of Top Ten Funeral Songs now contains no Christian songs or hymns at all - for the first time.  So let's take a look at the merits and demerits of the top ten, starting with 10th place : Always look on the bright side of life;

Why it's good for a funeral:

It makes you feel you can laugh.

Why it's bad for a funeral:

It doesn't give you any grounds to laugh in death

Line that's most like a Christian song:

You know, you came from nothing

Line that's least like a Christian song:

Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true

A Quote from (writer) Eric Idle:

Life doesn't make any sense, and we all pretend it does. Comedy's job is to point out that it doesn't make sense, and that it doesn't make much difference anyway.

Why I don't want this song at my funeral:

The song is originally sung to the Jesus figure (Brian) on the cross in Monty Python's Life of Brian film.  So not only is it meaninglessly defiant rubbish, it's origin is blasphemous too.

A better Christian alternative:

On that bright and cloudless morning when the dead in Christ shall rise,

And the glory of His resurrection share;

When His chosen ones shall gather to their home beyond the skies,

And the roll is called up yonder, I’ll be there.

[A brightness of a better sort.]